Thursday, August 18, 2011

hmm, life goes in cycles, apparently

Blogging has become so public. In the old days, in 2002, 2003, I felt I could open up a blog window and just type things out, and it didn't matter so much who might read it. Just type away my thoughts on something, hit publish, and get a hit of creative energy being let out.

Now, I don't feel I can do that. I feel like a blog post has to impress, has to wow, has to be about something.

I know this feeling is mostly my own fault, because heck, I want my blog to do these things. I like it when it works - when people are impressed by me, when they like what I do, creatively. And, I advertise my blog on my Facebook page. And I have no idea who is even really ON my Facebook page anymore! So therefore I'm trying to impress people and I don't even know who they are, much less what would impress them.

No wonder I feel so stuck! "I want to post on my blog. But, I want it to be awesome. But, I don't have the time to make it really awesome. (Pictures, well thought out words, etc.) So, I just won't post at all." 

Maybe that's OK. Maybe things go in cycles. But still, letting go of something that is both (a) a big part of my creative life and (b) fairly public (or maybe I'm just flattering myself) ... is hard.

I'm not letting go, entirely, right now. I'm just saying - life is busy and for various reasons, this blog is taking a back seat right now. Unintentionally, but it's happening all the same.

That's all for now.

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