In Glamour magazine, there is a page called the "Hey, it's OK" page. I don't buy Glamour anymore, for reasons both economical and social, but I do still have a few of these pages, ripped from Glamour, tacked up on my wall. And I've added to them, too - in blue ballpoint pen I've written in my own things that it's OK to have, do or be.
I like the idea of a list like this. It runs in the same vein as the phrase "Just enough is plenty," which I wrote about a few weeks ago, and which my cousin Maile was inspired by. The idea these two phrases share is that you don't need to be Super You in order to have a healthy and happy life. "Just enough" of something is just that, enough. And therefore, plenty. All you need.
Where "hey, it's OK..." comes in is as a reminder, and as a list we can post on our actual walls, or just carry around in our heads. We then apply the phrase to whatever it is that's flying around us like a pesky horsefly, wanting to land and bite us with guilt. "You're not sexy enough! You're not thin enough! You don't have all of this [whatever your project might be] under control! Everything is chaotic! Why even start that when you know you won't finish it perfectly?" Et cetera, ad nauseum.
Here is the list I have posted on my wall. It's from the May 2008 Glamour. What I've added in blue pen to the real list, I've added here in blue too.
After you read it, tell me your additions to the list. They don't have to be witty, they just have to be true.
Hey, it's OK...
...to cancel things.
...to have a strict no-bed-making policy on weekends. And no socializing, if that's how you feel.
...if you've never quite figured out what to do with the back of your hair. Or the front!
...to ask for whatever it is - an intern, an appliance, a third shot in your cappuccino - that helps you get the job done.
...if you're happy to have sex on the beach, provided it's actually on a bed in a room in a house that's on the beach.
...to buy $200 shoes but hoard Splenda packets from Starbucks.
...if you just don't get the appeal of techno and some indie music.
...to make your guy see the Sex and the City movie with you. Consider if payback for Rambo.
...if you're not especially interested in finding yourself. (Some days of the week.)
...TO SAY NO.
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